As a young boy I watched my mother and father enjoy a small glass of their favorite homemade wine in the evening after a hard day’s work on the farm. My father never went to the bar and never came home drunk; he was an intelligent man always in control of his life. Only during harvest time would there be beer in the fridge. Beer or a barley sandwich, as we called it was high energy food that would help nourish us during the long days of work during the harvest season.

   Growing up in a household where alcohol was never used as a “party enhancer” made an impression on me in those early years because it was through those very years that I saw other families being virtually torn apart because of the influence of booze. I couldn’t know at the time what an insidious foe alcohol could really be and why it was originally called “spirits.”

   Father taught me that every addict begins with one small drink, one beer or a glass of wine or a smoke to see what it would be like. He told me, "Son, go ahead have a drink but then as you sip away, watch how it causes people to make fools of themselves." This I did and was astounded with the degradation of people's maturity the more they drank. Normal, intelligent, well educated, professional people were being unashamedly reduced to foul mouthed, immoral, absolute fools within a few drinks. They were suddenly and foolishly willing to throw away their dignity and risk their career and all that was precious for the sake of another drink.

   Because I wanted to be with my friends I also drank from pub to pub and from party to party for many years while I was working on my first career in the Royal Canadian Navy. During that time I witnessed the destruction of family after family and career after career over drinking and drugs. The Navy had a drug and alcohol problem that was devastating their professionals, a problem that had begun with only a taste.

   An awakening came in my fifth year of service when my best friend Ray did not return home after a weekend binge. For over four years Ray and I had pubbed around enjoying the friendly atmosphere of the drinking establishments. He could out drink me, and just about everyone else I knew at the time, which had become a personal goal for him. Some fool had put in my friend’s mind that if you can hold your booze, you are a  “real man.”  Well Ray was a real man alright, he could drink all weekend and expend every dollar that he had earned during the week to prove that he could still hold the title! 

   Two weeks after his disappearance my dear friend was found in an abandoned house near the Canadian Forces Naval shipyards. He was dead and half eaten by a German Shepherd that had been locked in the house with him. Ray had passed out and aspirated on his own vomit; he had lost the right to his title, the right to hold another drink and forever the right to see another day of beautiful sunshine! 

   My father had been a good example for me and had given me good advice but both he and I were unaware of the insidious nature of the sweet taste of pleasure. By the time my friend so tragically died, my willpower to stop at one drink had also weakened to the point that I was almost not in control. I was on the edge of disaster, being drawn toward death!

   Where was my brain!  All the children that I knew who had lost their fathers, and parents who had lost their children, men and women who had destroyed their careers, individuals who’s health was irreversibly damaged, to me, all fell under a single category. Selfishness! People so selfish that they didn’t even care about the destruction of their own families or what pain they caused their loved ones or their own parents or their own dear children. Fools who traded a successful career and dignity just to have their right to a moment of pleasure in drugs, smokes or the bottle!

   I had become so disgusted with the whole scene that I vowed to never drink again as long as I lived. I vowed to withdraw my support of the industry and tell everyone why I had made my stand. I was 25 years old and I was deadly serious, and eternally angry. All anyone needs is a good reason to make a decisions like this, and the loss of my good friend Ray was more than enough reason. 

   As years passed my family and I lost count of the many people who gave up their dignity and sometimes their life just to assert their right to do what pleasure suited them at the time.

   After my retirement my wife Maggie and I moved to the Sunshine Coast of British Columbia to try and help people who were struggling with addictions. We served with the Salvation Army for a few years and grew to love those dear people who were desperately looking for a way out of their addictions. During that time we helped many to win their fight with substances that controlled their lives. Some we even successfully detoxed and treated in our own home.  Sadly, during those years several of our dear friends did lose the battle and will never see a day of sunshine again. Those losses weigh heavy upon our hearts and caused us to take an even harder stand against the deadly secret of alcohol and drugs.
 
   This is my story--I have been happy, healthy and sober for over 34 years. I am not recovering from alcohol, I am completely reformed, my will is strong, I will never risk all that is precious to me for a drink or a joint or a smoke to compromise my health. Knowing the truth is what has set me free.

   The formula for success that I taught my children while they were growing up was: “If you want things to go right in your life, you must do things right in your life!” I wish I had known then what I know now, that the momentary pleasures of alcohol or drugs are not ever worth the risk.  It has a spirit and that spirit will destroy you!

   "Has this made a difference in my life?" You may ask, "Has it been worth it?" Emphatically ... Yes, I have been successful in three major careers and retired early. I have a beautiful wife and family and a strong, healthy body and yes, I take great pleasure in the sunshine of each new day.

Do you need a good reason to fuel your willpower so that you don't lose precious family, a career or even your life? If you can't see all the destruction around you and make that your reason, then do it for yourself, your health, your happiness and your dignity. If you are trying to quit and are having a struggle, contact me and I will tell you about a secret weapon that you can use. 

Douglas Warren Greenfield
     Contact the author: